former independent fundamental baptists
All rights reserved. OPINION: Views expressed in Baptist News Global columns and commentaries are solely those of the authors. General I was brought on board to write about music, but the job quickly got out of hand. You dont want people looking at her in 10 years, when shes 15, and singing her heart out in the choir and saying, Oh, thats that poor girl who was abused, she said a pastor had told her. He is pastor of Faithful Word Baptist Churchin Tempe, Arizona. Women who are mothers have authority as it relates to the children, but they must submit to their husbands. if (document.MAX_used != ',') document.write ("&exclude=" + document.MAX_used); Women and yes, little girls are said to be temptresses who tempt men to lust after them sexually and are responsible for that sin. Thank you for this! Recovering fundamentalist ?" because this probably sounds more like something you'd . Pearl responded: Its supposed to. Pearl also said the physically abusive training for kids should begin as early as 9 months. The environment that I and other independent fundamental Baptist children were brought up in, I believe, played a part in making boys into monsters. earthmama514July 3, 2014 in Testimonies of Former Christians, Hi, im new here. Not from the point of view of them as people who are moral ends in themselves. She quickly reprimanded me and informed me that god would be severely displeased if we left and to just pray and read my bible more. zoneId = 'Array'; New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. What they fail to realize is that manipulative individuals can use their presumed spiritual purity as a cloak under which they can commit offenses without being suspected or reported, he said. Former Independent Fundamental Baptists - IFB KJV. Its hard to find the time to sit and type a huge intro when you have a very busy toddler needing your attention. My heart goes out to you. Retrieved December 10, 2021, from https://www.patheos.com/blogs/danthropology/2015/07/details-have-emerged-about-the-faith-based-counseling-josh-duggar-received-after-molesting-five-girls/?fbclid=IwAR0luoxgzOQWLmJ60E-KYB659hYj4cqJmtUT1OWoHOFEtZYqxOSctOjyKRg. You can't control them any more than they can control you. https://www.reddit.com/r/exchristian/wiki/faq. Just as they must accept your decisions you must accept theirs. They married when both were 19. Parents of adults primarily use religion and/or money as ways of controlling and, manipulating their adult children. Talking Points Memo. From the time I was young, I remember we always had to wear skirts, keep our hair long (well the girls at least), were constantly reminded to dress and act modestly so we didnt tempt men into sin, and were taught to keep silent in the church. Women were pretty much only good for making babies to keep your quiver full and for cooking/cleaning/housework etc. Read More. To many Americans, the Duggar family was known as an example of traditional values, treasuring the life of the unborn, protecting the purity of their unwed children, bearing a strong religious influence not only in ultraconservative Christian circles, but also among homeschooling parents. You deserve to be free from all that unnecessary mental baggage. You can reach Lawrence at: Women are definitely positioned as the temptress, Skwarczynski explained. When the child didnt stop, Pearl directed him to pull over and get a switch from a tree. Gothards curriculum was used by the Duggar family of the television show 19 Kids and Counting. In 2003, the couples eldest son admitted to touching two of his sisters. Unfortunately, so is the mishandling of sexual crimes. You really have to look at things with a wide philosophical lens. And breaking a childs rebellious spirit is a philosophical construct throughout the IFB faith. ALANSON, Mich. Tucked off a poorly paved, unplowed road across Burt Lake from the sleepy Up North vacation town of Indian River, the Northern Michigan Baptist Bible Church would struggle to fit in a congregation of 100 people. He advocates for the death penaltyfor homosexuals, and prayed for the deaths of former U.S. president Barack Obamaand Caitlyn Jenner. Victim shaming abounded, and victims say that if a young girl was raped, Gothard insisted that they were no longer virgins and were not pure. "God" is a projection of mankind's basic fear of being alone and his fear of the unknown, and of course the fear of death. The first church was founded there in 1688, in Middletown and was made up of many who had fled persecution in the other colonies. When she refused to stay quiet, her home and vehicles were vandalized. The psychologist said that he believes with little doubt that my crazy religious upbringing caused the PTSD and that while I probably had a propensity for bipolar already that my parents unbringing pulled the trigger. Yet no matter how much they despise the church they attend they keep goin back because the Bible says "forsake not the assembling together of believers" I never hear anything positive from them about church but that doesn't stop them. ), "cult". Courtesy Heiler wasnt even taught the basics about menstruation. A big teaching by the IBLP and independent fundamental Baptists alike is the Umbrella of Protection. God is above all, then pastors, then fathers, then mothers, then children. We were there for 3 years. document.write ("&loc=" + escape(window.location)); At Saturdays (April 29) , Wednesday, April 26 This teaching tells members, especially women, that as long as they stay under their umbrella, stay in their submissive and rightful role, nothing no sin, no harm, not even sexual assault can hurt them. They are presented as extensions of the father. Skwarczynski called this concept a powder keg. Men are taught a cornucopia of conflicting ideas about sex its awesome, its forbidden, you cant control it. Ive been writing for City Pulse since the paper started more than 17 years. KJV. Bruce Gerencser, 65, lives in rural Northwest Ohio with his wife of 44 years. Jim Bob Duggar formerly served in the Arkansas House of Representatives and announced recently that he is running for Arkansas State Senate in the 7th District. Counseling has helped that a lot. His IFB church, Ann Arbor Baptist, focused on the importance of the Umbrella, he said. And catholics, well, we were all going to hell anyhow. Because of their reality TV show, the Duggars and their particular brand of Christianity made its way into the homes of Americans, both fans and critics alike. Having sex out of wedlock, Rebekah Chatfield explained, was tantamount to being married in the eyes of God. How come many Americans haven't heard of the Independent Fundamental Baptist church movement? Its hard to find the time to sit and type a huge intro when you have a very busy toddler needing your attention. Having only been raised in those and informed if we ever went to a different church then God would strike us dead, we attended the same even after marriage, despite all the anxiety it caused. Bruce pastored Evangelical churches for twenty-five years in Ohio, Texas, and Michigan. The duo have published four books and volumes of articles on the topic, starting with their 1994 book, To Train Up a Child. It was updated and republished in 2015. I have been free from my former IFB group for two months, two weeks and three days. And critics said it was that environment that allowed him to allegedly sexually exploit women, including accusations that he abused a former 15-year-old student who went on to become his sister-in-law. It is self-empowering for the churchmen and self-destroying for the victim. I was raised in an independent fundamental Baptist household. My point, though, is for you to use your timing. '&charset='+document.characterSet : '')); if (document.mmm_fo) document.write ("&mmm_fo=1"); if (!document.MAX_used) document.MAX_used = ','; Driven by an idea of life drawn from the pages of the King James version of the Bible, which they believe to the only word of God without error or omission, the leaders of these churches are deities of sorts, who nurture a cult-like sphere of influence prone to extreme sexism, purity constructs, bans on interracial or inter-religious marriages and education that fail to address anything beyond the insular communities in which they live. Not to mention of course the psychological impact of the repressive and abusive environment fostered by the philosophy. Spanking kids stems from the book of Psalms, where readers are implored not to spare the rod or risk spoiling the child. Someone to come sit with me, make some meals, anything. I find that im just sad for them because they are missing out on real joy and a great life. By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines. Former independent fundamental baptist church members what was the craziest thing you heard was a sin did you do it before and after. Big mistake. I don't know your parents and siblings, of course, but their willingness to ostracize you seems to be a wholly religious thing. They were also distanced themselves further from the Independent Baptists because the latter were increasingly tempted by the King James Only view of the Bible and riven with debates over how much separation was required to be faithful. Yes. (n.d.). When we asked for more help to put the baby things together as my husband had surgery on his wrist and was in a cast and I was on strict restrictions NOT to lift anything, we had zero people show up. According to him, this was their fault. Details have emerged about the faith-based counseling Josh Duggar received after molesting Five girls. Counting on s Jim Bob Duggar is running for Arkansas State Senate-and Derick Dillard has thoughts. Gothard himself has been accused of more than 34 counts of sexual harassment. They dont do dancing. This includes tempting an abuser to sexually abuse a child. In response to the concerns, some local Baptist churches separated from their former denominations and conventions and reestablished the congregations as Independent Baptist churches. These confused and contradictory teachings are combined with a lack of reproductive health education from the church schools. The flagship university of IFB, Bob Jones University, also banned interracial dating until 2004. var m3_r = Math.floor(Math.random()*99999999999); [CDATA[ You were born depraved, so it goes, but Thank God you have churchmen there to help you with the cure: the Bible, p, Bill, I wrote them a letter in November telling them in no uncertain terms would I let them run my life anymore and I was done being scared of what they thought or would do. The co-founder, Paul Kingsbury, recently was forced to leave his position at North Love Baptist Church in Rockford, Ill., for his role in helping a sex offender avoid prosecution by supporting him overseas as a missionary. This continued for miles. It means that the church is Baptist in doctrine and polity, fundamental in its stance on separation, and independent of denominational structures such as American Baptist or Southern Baptist. When asked to define spanking, Chatfield told the newspapers editorial board it was normally a swat on the behind. He also said he thinks spanking is good if a child, at a young age, is misbehaving. His church requires written approval from a parent or guardian to administer spankings during school hours. In fact having a child is what started me really opening my eyes. It became an independent church in 1746. if (document.mmm_fo) document.write ("&mmm_fo=1"); It is such an annoyance. He also recalled an instance from his youth involving a particularly physically abusive father, who he said pulled out a gun after he had been abusing his wife and children one evening. At the movements core is a fundamental set of beliefs, seasoned by the personalities of each individual pastor, and most important is what is referred to in IFB circles as The Umbrella of Authority. This teaching is key to understanding how abuse mentally, physically and sexually can go undetected and unreported for years while the survivors hide the trauma out of shame and threat of exposure. : Freedom, liberty, history, politics, psychology, medicine, arts, sciences, games, sensational sex, jamming with friends, good food, drink, and conversation. if (document.referrer) document.write ("&referer=" + escape(document.referrer)); So often, predators and abusive behavior by men in the independent fundamental Baptist world are firmly swept under the rug labeled the cause of Christ, forgive and forget, and she tempted him, and never see the light of day. Skwarczynski heard sermons and teachings about rape. I hope your husband will follow the logical path out of christinsanity with you. I know of a couple of websites that may be helpful for people (esp. Didymus, J. T. (2021, February 17). After doing some reading lately, I realize we fell into the Quiverfull/Christian patriarchy family types as well . Chatfield recalled an instance in which her then-boyfriend and future husband, Aaron Chatfield, had run around the school in his boxer shorts. By zoneId = '14'; Josh Duggar: Founder of reformers unanimous accused of sex abuse cover-up protecting sex offender from prosecution: Report. if (document.MAX_used != ',') document.write ("&exclude=" + document.MAX_used); Why can't Christian family members just let us be happy and free?! As a survivor of this movement, I never was surprised that Josh got away with his crimes for so long, that hell never face legal consequences for sexually molesting children. She can't be." Those who were particularly devout and raised in Fundamentalist denominations, however, are more inclined to suffer from what Dr. Marlene Winell, author of Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former. I am just so happy that you are atleast mentally free from that, (dare I say it? When she was born she was perfect. [1] As a ministry of the First Baptist Church of Hammond, it focuses on training pastors, missionaries and Christian teachers to work in Independent Baptist schools. I do feel happy that they will never hurt my child like they did me because they will have no presence in her life. Other accusations by former members and followers speak to the mistreatment and harm they experienced through his teachings, the ATI curriculum, the groups conferences, their facilities, and more. That firm was Gibbs & Associates, founded by David Gibbs Jr. of the Christian Law Association. You were born depraved, so it goes, but Thank God you have churchmen there to help you with the cure: the Bible, properly decoded. var width = jQuery(window).width(); I am the daughter of an IFB missionary/evangelist, sister of an IFB pastor, and granddaughter of an IFB pastor. If you are a fan of shows where large quiverfull families have strict courting rules for their children and purity culture is promoted, then youre likely familiar with TLCs 19 Kids and Counting. The leading practitioners of spanking as training your children into godliness are Michael and Debi Pearl. But hiding behind this humble country church veneer, critics said, is a loose confederacy of similar minded people. The 30 . The problem is I am being drug down from this happiness whenever I discuss this issue with my wife or other family members. She also volunteers for a nonprofit helping victims of religious abuse. Its a theological landscape that leaves the vulnerable children, women and LGBTQ folks at the mercy of a strict Old Testament theology that is backed with commands to still their rebellious souls, even if it requires a paddling that leaves bruises or welts on their behinds. 0:36. Your story is so important to be told and I am so glad you are here at ex-c to speak out about quiverfull. One other thing, take your time about coming out to your husband, family and others until YOU are ready. Gothard), (F. B. Intelligent discussion, not embittered ranting. As a religious abuse survivor, this is my message to Baptist pastors, The weakness of complementarian theology on display in Duggar trial. And to this day that's true. Being raised pentecostal myself, I understand the shunning part of the independent baptist denomination and what it does to families. I was raised catholic, but I have some relatives who are independent baptist because southern baptists are just too liberal. However, Gothard did resign from his leadership role of the organization he founded, stating that he did participate in inappropriate behavior against females. I did know about them, though, because I thought they were trying to make a profit off the very things we preached, while the rest of us independent fundamental Baptists were truly following God. I was judgey from afar and annoyed that they would be praised for doing what I and so many other people did live the life of a fundamentalist Christian. This thread is archived New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast comments . "I don't care what he says, I will never believe that a young, innocent baby deserves hell.". All of the people interviewed in this story said that interracial relationships, or relationships with someone from a different religion, even other Christians, were either banned or discouraged. First of all, I admire your courage in speaking out. When the toddler started acting up again, Pearl directed the father to repeat the action. I have never felt so happy and free.". For me, after years of questioning, the realization that I -- a mere mortal -- am a better parent than biblegod was my major step toward atheism. By the mid-1970s SBC fundamentalists were rejecting the fundamentalist label completely, arguing it was no . My husband is still a Christian and as of now I havent really approached the subject with him as its still so new to me that I dont feel that I have enough education yet to help him understand why and give him the logical reasons why god isnt real. History [ edit] Child physical abuse also known as godly discipline is common within independent fundamental Baptist homes. Pastor Jim Vineyard was an expert in the tactic. At age 12, Heilers mother moved to Gaylord, where she attended Grace Baptist Church and school. Christine Pelisek Updated August 28, 2015 09:20 P. M. (n.d.). You , 1905 E. Michigan Ave.Lansing, MI 48912 Welcome to Ex-C! April 24, 2023 . My entire life had been filled with questions and no answers as well as unanswered prayers. They most often have come to the aid of offenders and not the victims. Your story is very well written and I found it moving. Caitlin, C. (2021, December 9). 127 because it struck me now - though it didn't when I was a Christian - that the psalm talks about children from the point of view of what power or prestige they confer on the parent. He and his wife have six grown children and thirteen grandchildren. First, they create a problem that doesn't exist, then they offer a fake solution to the problem that doesn't exist. Editors Note: The Independent Fundamental Baptist Church movement is separate from the New Independent Fundamental Baptist Church, which the Anti-Defamation League has designated as a hate group. He told her, As long as you are under your dads roof, you must submit to his authority and God will protect you from anything bad happening, Woodbury recalled. (517) 371-5600 An 1970s-era handout from a Bill Gothard Institute in Basic Youth Conflicts seminar that shows the father as the hammer who hits the wife, the chisel, to shape the children in a Christian home. If such physical relationships were discovered as was the case with Chatfield and her husband, Aaron marriage in the church is required in order to satisfy Gods commandments. We ended moving when my daughter was 6 months old to a new town several hours away for my husbands work. And while it was certainly better then the IFB churches I had attended growing up, something about it still didnt set right with me. document.write (document.charset ? He said that congregants and leaders simply do not expect such abuses to happen in their midst not under Gods eye. In all the churches referenced in this report, women are prohibited from wearing pants. At least, he got the dress part right, right? The IFB church movement saw rapid numeric growth in the 1960s-1980s. I didnt know anything about anatomy. Former independent fundamental baptist church members what was the craziest thing you heard was a sin did you do it before and after. If your parents were wrong, God would still protect you from anything bad happening because you are under that umbrella of protection, Woodbury explained. } The IFB rejects any governmental authority over the operation of the church ( 2 Corinthians 6:14 ). Rebekah Chatfield, 26, said she found herself thrust into the middle of this culture in the fourth grade. I looked at her and thought "there is no way this little person is evil. If you have conservative homeschooling friends who talk about Michelle doing the same, then youve probably heard of the fundamentalist curriculum the Duggars used called Advance Training Institute. This organization and its founder created the fundamentalist Christian homeschool curriculum the Duggar family used to teach their large family. Now, these former members of independent fundamental Baptist churches share how their experiences will affect the rest of their lives. Great extimony! (yeah cause that always helped!). Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD:and the fruit of the womb is his reward.As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man;so are children of the youth.Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them:they shall not be ashamed,but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate. And its a rigid patriarchal sort of existence: When men are wrong, God is said to protect women and children if they follow the directions anyway. A few years later we moved again to a new state where he once again was a youth/assistant pastor and after a few years there, he resigned, we moved again (this time in the same state), and he started his own church. I agree that lot people have no clue (even other Christians) just how crazy they are and damaging it is growing up in them. If you ever considered yourself a conservative Christian, youre likely familiar with the Duggar family. When they did that, my siblings followed suit. In the independent fundamental Baptist community, pastors are the ultimate authority and council: "Any issues, even legal issues, go to the pastor first, not the police.
Why Didn't The Cast Of Cheers Attend Coach Funeral,
Ashley Biden Husband,
Articles F